Hmmm, first post, this can't be so bad! So the past weeks been pretty crazy so far, imagine that - it's only Tuesday. Alex and I are over, and honestly...I think I'm kind of happy that it's done. Yeah, I loved him, but it was a bitter sweet kind of thing. What I had with him, left me a little too dependent, and I'm proud to say I'm ready [and jump started] on becoming my own woman again. With Alex, I kind of just let my self go, because I had always figured that I would have him at the end of the day. Guessed wrong! So, I'm picking up my grades, working out, and in general, kicking ass.
When I woke up on Monday, I had a sort of epiphany. This exact time, just last year, is when my life came to a hault. I had my incident in Doylestown, got knee surgery, was subjected to bed-rest for about a month, came back, and the world hadn't missed a beat since I'd been gone. But you see, I never really caught back up. Instead, I just let go. I let school go to shit because it was practically over, and I had missed the last essential month, teachers were tired and didn't feel like re-teaching the work, they just wanted to go home. I didn't have to worry much about my weight because I'd lost so much from the post surgery, pill induced loss of appetite, and I was pretty much thriving in stupid things. Well, I think it's high and time I hit rewind and grasp.
I've gained weight from getting really ill in December, but I'm really starting to work it off, so nice. I've picked back up on sewing, so it's kind of like an entire new wardrobe has risen from the dusk of my 'This is still cute, but it's from my chubby chunker days' pile, my grades are looking up [101% in chemistry? fucking holla at your girl], Izzy's been back around and Pete and Pete is coming together, I'm trying harder not to be so awkward in the social sense, I've been writing more, drawing more, and I'm really regaining my confidence.
Speaking of confidence, I'm kind of, on the prowl again. So I guess that's gonna be a big key importance. I'd be lying if I were to say I wasn't dying to get on the scene again for a short period of time. I'd always wander back to that line of Tegan an Sara, 'I'm not unfaithful but I'll stray', I'd always catch myself looking, inching towards a little flirting. Yikes, well, like I said earlier, I'm free now. So I've gotta make use of what I got. I've never really utilized the factor of being 'cute', or realized the the mileage of a simple smile and a little dab of makeup, until recently. It's amazing what those little things can do, and where they can get you.I've been listening to alot of SYG, particularily 'Goonies Never Say Die' , the song actually came on in Hot Topic when Tiff and I ventured to the Mont mall. It's following me, though this has positive potential. Oh! And, today, after a fail of the prowl, there was success in picking up that glorious perfume from P!NK, that shit that Eric guy said 'I'd marry any woman wearing this scent' to Izzy on New Years. Two bottles infact!
The last three days have proven nothing but success and I've got good time ahead of me, let it roll.